Oh, the Attitude

There is this problem that most middle schools have. It is called an attitude problem. The students come in with it, it rubs off on the teachers, everyone leaves angry.

There is little that a teacher can do to change the attitude of her students except for being up-beat themselves. If a teacher can get students excited that's the best feeling in the world. Students want to learn more, teachers want to teach more, and everyone forgets that they're supposed to have a chip on their shoulder.

The magical question is how does a teacher, who is being bombarded with negativity  change that into something positive. 

I had one professor answer this question by saying, "It is easier to catch flies with honey." I laughed an thought, she's never met a seventh grade girl!

All joking aside, there are a few tricks I learned over the years that I have been in the classroom. The first being smile. New teachers are told not to smile until after winter (Christmas) break. I say smile on the first day. If you're working with inner city kids, smile as they are walking in the building. These kids need a happy face to see everyday. They get enough trouble at home, they don't need more from a grumpy teacher who is spouting off rules left and right. 

The best advice I ever received was from my Bible. 

¹⁹ Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; ²⁰ for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. ²¹ Therefore put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word,which is able to save your souls. ²² But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. ²³ For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. ²⁴ For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. ²⁵ But the one who looks into the perfect law,the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing.
²⁶ If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person's religion is worthless. ²⁷ Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.
James 1:19 - 27

Our students need that listening ear first, sage advice second, and a screaming banshee last. I have found working with urban area students, most just want a listening ear. Someone to say, I hear what you are saying and I understand. Many don't even want advice, they just want that person to talk too. Teachers often times hear something these students are telling us, though, and over react to one part and miss what the students are trying to say. That is why we need to be quite and listen sometimes.

However, there are times when being nice just is not cutting it. So, what's next...

Well here's what has always been my second step - loving discipline. Many times loving discipline shows itself through a look (AHH! The dirty teacher look!) other times it is just a couple of short words. ("Please stop." "Knock it off.") Loving discipline also shows itself  through consistency. If I allow a child to speak horribly to me one day because they're having a bad day, I better expect them to do the same on the next day. The students will try being nasty every day to see when your (the teacher's) break point will hit.

We really don't like having to deal with the same behavior daily. Little ones do need that daily reminder of behavior. Yet, by sixth grade they have been practicing for seven years on how to behave in a classroom. They know better. I like to give the blanket warning at the beginning of the year. I also make sure that my expectations are posted around the room and that they have a copy of them in easy access. Middle school students need to learn that they only get one shot, after that all bets are off.

The last step I take is removing the students from class. This step is for students who are so disruptive they need a time out or who are causing a problem for the safety of the other students. Removing a child from the classroom should never happen because you, the teacher, are angry. All that does is get your frustrations out on the student and the problem is left unresolved.

Just as a side note since this is being posted a few days after I started writing it, my students that I mention in the beginning have started a rumor war with me. They figure that the teachers will turn against each other and  the once internal struggle of the staff will come back. What they don't know is that we already know their game and really don't pay too much attention to what they are saying. (Seventh grade girls. >: Þ )